Blog Reviews!

Lauren,

Your introduction to Thursday’s post was very interesting! The beginning of the second paragraph was funny, but I think the paper might have been stronger if you chose a couple of the examples and expanded on them and described exactly how they are incorrect instead of just naming the multitude of stereotypes. As far as grammar and punctuation go, you may want to look into adding commas in places where pauses are or where they are grammatically needed. Also, just as a simple way of making sure the piece is at its best is to perform a quick review or edit before submission – that will catch things like forgetting a letter in a word J I usually catch 2 or 3 when I edit.

Overall, your idea was very interesting and I enjoyed reading the post (it made me laugh!)

Your introduction to the Tuesday post was awesome!! I was really pulled into the piece immediately and I enjoyed your usage of quotes. I also liked how you included personal experience in the piece as well as your direct opinion. I enjoyed the general point of the entire paper and thought that overall it was a strong idea and a good post J.

Jessica,

Your piece regarding Native Americans in the U.S. and their economic influence was spectacular! I really enjoyed the fluidity and authority of the piece. I learned a lot. Everything you stated in your initial argument was supported by some citation or fact and your word choice was excellent! I also enjoyed how you put yourself into the post by explaining your connection with the subject. Great job!

Your post concerning materialism was also very interesting! You made a strong argument overall and I think you made very good points throughout. I liked the organization of the post as it was very easy to follow and straightforward. I agree with your statement that materialism breeds competition within the market and that it is a good thing and that materialism creates waste (and that is negative)! So much waste!  The first paragraph was interesting because it was so short and possible for an essay you may want to expand or create another introductory paragraph below (if the two sentences at the beginning are artistic intention). Either way, great post! J